Ending It

When I started this blog, I honestly had a delusion goal of eventually writing for Grantland, my favorite news/media site (hey, why set an easy goal?). As anyone who has read this blog can tell you, nothing I've done even approaches the quality of work they do there (except Andrew Sharp's 2013 BQBL summaries; my league emails were better than those), and I probably have about the same chance of winning the lottery as I do of being a contributor to that site.

So what am I to do with this realization? Close up shop and dedicate more time to writing documentation for my job like an adult? Annoy my friends with more ridiculously long emails about fringe subjects and projected cost summaries? Try to write the great American novel just like 45 million other people in a publishing landscape which looks like the music industry about the time Napster showed up?

It just so happens that the timing of this realization really hitting home has coincided with a major change in my life started: my wife and I have decided to file for divorce. Not only has the decision greatly increased the amount of free time I have, it has given me a personal subject with which a good number of people might be able to relate and possibly receive some sort of comfort (or at least commiseration). For those who have had the good fortune of missing out on such an experience, my hope is that it might give some insight into the process and the feelings involved so they might be able to understand it on some level and possibly be better equipped to give sympathy or advice to a friend going through it. But it's mostly about me getting through it.

So I will do what I always swore I would not do: write about my private, personal, and (sigh) emotional goings-on during this process to strangers on the internet. The series will be called Ending It, and I think it will be equal parts catharsis and confession. The core of the decision is that I need to write more to get better, and this is the most natural subject matter for me right now. The (hopeful) secondary benefit is a way to process everything that is happening.

I have purposely tried to stay as anonymous as possible on this blog because I'm the kind of person who isn't a fan of sharing intimate details with a lot of people, and while this will obviously make it easier for close friends to identify me, with the prevalence of divorce, it likely won't help anyone else. If you're reading this and think you know who I am, please don't ask me about it; allow me to live in blissful ignorance and continue spouting my drivel in fake anonymity. If you absolutely must contact me, please limit it to the comments section.